By most accounts I am still a young man. When I tell people I'm 26 I feel the weight of that immaturity. I still have the vanity of a young man. I have a situation that makes me struggle with my that vanity though: Babies.
The young man vanity dies hard. I can try to dress like a young man. I can work on all the hottest slang. I can go to a bar or a concert and sometimes slip in with the undergrads unnoticed. I can even try my damndest to have adult conversation with someone. All of that is merely temporary because I'm a father. And part of being a father is being degraded by and for my children.
Before I had kids I Loved Halloween because I could dress up as Zutroy the Vampire Clown. I'd put on a cloak, a cape, fangs, and clown makeup. It was awesome. May I present you with my last 3 halloweens.
101 Dalmations (Melissa was Cruella DeVille)
The Rubbles -Barney, Betty, and BamBam
Peanuts -Lucy, Charlie Brown, and Snoopy
Folks, welcome to the world of theme costumes. Goodbye Vanity. At least I still have more dignity than these babies.